


Snoke, The Knife And The Droid

by Altruistic_Computer



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Blood and Violence, Chopper With A Knife, Crack, Dark Comedy, Gen, It Makes No Sense Do Not Ask, Post-Canon, Sabine Wren Is Very Angry, Snoke is Ezra, Some dark comedy, The Dark Side of the Force, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:40:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25771489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Altruistic_Computer/pseuds/Altruistic_Computer
Summary: Ezra returned from the Unknown Regions. He wasn't the same though. Sabine tries to make him return to the Light Side.
Relationships: C1-10P | Chopper & Sabine Wren, Ezra Bridger & C1-10P | Chopper, Ezra Bridger & Sabine Wren
Kudos: 5





	Snoke, The Knife And The Droid

Snoke sat in the cold room. He liked to reminisce about the man he once was, before all of the horrors had finally found him. Back in the days when he was in the Unknown Regions. The days when he really lived.

  
The days when he was the boy known as Ezra Bridger.

  
He had such a faint, flickering memory. He knew of only a few things. An angry metal monster of some sort. It had chased him through the rooms of a ship, determined to destroy him. It had won and he had been almost fatally injured. A girl with brightly coloured hair, the one who he had effortlessly flirted with. Hadn’t gone too well. Force, he was terrified of them.

  
When the dyed-hair-woman and the droid-monster stormed into the throne room, he was, of course, terrified. The droid-monster in particular was smaller than he remembered. 

  
“Ezra, I’m going to get Chopper to kill you if you don’t come home!” She shouted as he flinched and reached for his lightsaber. “Don’t pull this ‘I’m _Snoke_ a _Sith lord_! You’re NOT!” He was surprised at how loud the woman was.

  
“What, what was your name again?” His voice quavered, though he tried to hide it.

  
“I am Sabine Wren, you are meant to have been home by now. It’s been almost 40 years!”

  
“I said I would be back soon.”

  
“Soon? Soon! You don’t look like you were back soon! What the hell happened to you?”

  
“Lots of things!”

  
“Right. I’m sorry about this. If you’re not going to be back by tomorrow, I’m getting Chopper to kill you!”

* * *

  
He thought about this dilemma all night. In the end, he decided that death was only a small risk.

  
As the sun rose, Sabine and Chopper returned to the room. Chopper had a large knife clasped in one of his claws. 

  
With great anger, the knife was plunged into his foot and he tried not to scream as the cut began to bleed. He let it happen again and again, until his feet were stained dark red. Chopper laughed as he went towards Ezra’s legs. 

  
“Fine! Fine! I will go home. Will you get Chopper away from me?”

  
“Finally!”

  
And that was how, the story of how the universe was saved by a violent droid with a large knife ended.

**Author's Note:**

> I just don't know what to say about what I just wrote...
> 
> Thanks for reading! Please leave kudos/comments if you enjoyed it or if you have noticed any errors! I don't own Star Wars (obviously).


End file.
